I won’t survive another child becoming an addict. I am going to be looking for a therapist for M. I really believe there is something not right. It is not normal to go from happy to fiercely mad in 60 seconds. It is not right that she speaks to everyone with contempt. It is not right that every year since she was in Kindergarten I have been called in to speak to her teachers about her attitude. I am very worried she is bi-polar or something. This is not normal and this is not going to magically disappear.
I turned my back on J and let my husband convince me that it was just a phase he was going through. When we finally dealt with what was going on it was to late. M has many of the same qualities J has. I can see her trying to self medicate in the future to help deal with her EXTREME emotions and her anxiety. I am going to invest in a good therapist and pray to God on my hands and knees every night that she can find her way because I can not go through this again. I won’t survive it.
Why is loving and wanting happiness for your children not enough? I swear I sometimes with fierce determination and sheer force of will pretend that everything is going to be fine. Only I can’t quite convince myself with any kind of conviction.