Living with no expectations…

A lovely young lady left me a comment on the previous post. I told her I had hope but it made me think….do I really?  I have decided I am not able to separate hope and expectations. Living without hope is kind of sad and lonely in a way. I think it makes me isolate myself to anything that would even remotely entertain the idea of hope because hope leads to expectations which leads to crushing disappointment.

Today J told me he has an appointment with a Suboxone Doctor who is covered under our insurance.  I was happy for him. He has been asking me to call and find one and to call the insurance company and the pharmacy and the on and on… I refused. Every single time I initiated or was involved in any kind of help, it turned into my fix. He never took ownership of anything and it meant nothing, so he invested nothing. I want to be hopeful but I am just not going to go there. He can own this and it can be his success or his failure. I take no ownership over any of it.


About madyson007

I am a mom of 4 who thought she was home free when my oldest son went off to college. My serious blunder? Genetics and being naive or maybe just plain stupid.
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5 Responses to Living with no expectations…

  1. Dawn M McCoy says:

    I think YOU not doing tgat was flipping AMAZING!!!!!!& WTG.

  2. Tori Lee says:

    Good for you!

    Staying out of their way is so hard but the more I try to interfere the harder I fall.

  3. MammaP says:

    You can’t work on two recovery’s, He has to own it ! As for hope & expectations ? When I was starting my treatment for cancer I asked the question ” What expectations should I have ? ” A wise man my Oncologist..said ” Drop the word expectations from your vocabulary” Expectation is what you expect will happen and will lead to nothing but disappointments.Hope is the word which leads to endless healthy possibilities..Worked for me 😉

  4. Liz says:

    Hang in there Mady!

  5. Syd says:

    I’ve heard that expectations are premeditated resentments. Hope is what keeps each of us going.

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