You probably don’t know this about me but I am obsessed with outdoor Christmas lights. Every year I buy and collect things like light up deer, light up wreaths, light up candles for the windows, Icicle lights, snowflake lights and ….wow it is scary how much I could list. My husband isn’t really into the whole decorate the house thing and thinks we are verging on “The Griswold’s Christmas Vacation” territory. I can assure you I am not that bad…umm yet, but mostly because I am on my own when putting up the lights. I LOVE them!
It drives me crazy that I have to fight to get them on because my husband won’t set the timer any earlier than 6:00pm even though it is basically pitch dark at 5:00pm. He is such a control freak! Sometimes I wonder how we are still married. He has a lot of trouble seeing past the end of his own nose. Little things like turning the lights on at dusk would make me so happy…why does he not recognize things like that? I know that he likes Dr. Pepper so I ALWAYS buy it when I shop. I know that he doesn’t like it when I move furniture around so I try not to and I know that he loves it when I go to bed at the same time as him. Oops that was a little off topic…
One of my most favorite things in the whole world is when fresh snow falls and covers the earth. Everything is so silent and still. The world looks so beautiful and all things seem possible…like a new beginning. Christmas lights peaking through the snow and slowly melting to unveil a shiny bright sparkle in the dark is heaven to me. I use to consciously try to create a memory every year. I would take J and his sister outside in the dark to look at the fresh fallen snow and bright lights and say “Look around guys we are creating a christmas memory”, it seems so silly now. I wonder if they do remember? I never did it with the younger two, in fact there is so much they missed out on. Life got busier and harder. My parents retired to Florida and I was alone much of the time.
I am praying fiercely that J has an epiphany and realizes that he could choose to wake up tomorrow and begin a new life, one with out the burden of his past. A real live Christmas Miracle for us all to behold. I believe!