So unsure…

I know this might be really hard to understand but I really love my husband. I don’t want to sound like a pathetic weak woman who rolls over and takes it because that is not me. I don’t know that love is going to carry us through it this time but I am also not sure I am ready to give up. Right now I can’t even talk to him…so we sit in limbo while I try to figure it out.

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About madyson007

I am a mom of 4 who thought she was home free with her oldest son when he went off to college. My serious blunder? Genetics and being naive or maybe just plain stupid.
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4 Responses to So unsure…

  1. Syd says:

    And I loved my wife also and still do, but I knew that I needed help. I needed to figure out how to love without harboring resentment that was eating away the love to the point that I dreaded being around her. There is a way.

  2. Anna says:

    It is possible to love from afar instead of close up. Personally, I need to have peace in my own home in order to preserve my own health. If you are not safe physically or emotionally in your own home than you need to make a change.

    I do not know all of your circumstances so please take my advice with a grain of salt. Find some emotional balance and then you can make a decision. But, if you are truely unsafe right now, then get out right now.

  3. notmyboy says:

    Love is a comfort. It lifts you up. It is your soft place to land. Love is NOT chaotic.

    I know you have younger children in your home, so I want you to be mindful of one thing…those children may grow to resent, if not outright hate you for not standing up to their dad. Children need a hero, and they often look to the other parent (the one not causing the turmoil) to lift them out of their situation. When that parent fails to “rescue” them, the fallout can be immense and negative. I say this because my dad was a real S.O.B. when I was growing up. He was a decent enough dad, but he treated my mom like garbage. My mom stood by him, although their arguments were epic. Bottom line, she was unwilling to take a stand for many, many years. I HATED MY MOM!!!! I viewed her as a weak, pathetic woman. I was so mean to her. I vowed with everything I am to never be like my mom, to never put up with crap from a man, to always put my children first.

    My mom finally kicked my dad out, and that is when things started to change. My dad got his life together, and my parent reunited after much therapy and healing. In a few days, they will celebrate 51 years of marriage. I could not ask for a better dad, and I love my mom to the moon and back… she’s come a long way.

    Side: My mom was also a teacher with little to no money to her name when she finally bit the bullet and asked my dad to leave. She finally stood up and acted on faith. Just something to think about.

    You are in my prayers.

  4. Ron Grover says:

    From a mans point of view here.

    Love does not solve all problems. When you need help that is the ultimate love, do what you have to do to make it work. Seek out help. And I bet he’ll be pissed but nothing worthwhile comes without a cost.

    Don’t go to bed resenting what he does. But much more important, don’t go to bed resenting what you didn’t do.

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