I see that someone has visited my blog and read a large number of my posts. I hope there was some wise nugget of information you were able to take away with you or maybe just some comfort that you are not alone on this journey.
I will never forget the day that I discovered there was a community of parents who were also navigating through the world of their child’s addiction. I was so relieved to know that I was not alone.
When I first stumbled on my son’s addiction, I was so filled with shame I could barely breathe. In fact I literally had trouble swallowing. I had no idea how sick I was. I had no idea how sick I looked. A co-worker recently told me that when I came back to work that summer, she thought I was ill. In fact, she really thought I had cancer. I had been loosing weight through the year but it was in the spring that things really hit the fan. So coming back in September was startling for my co-workers.
It really was not until I started blogging about what was going on in my life that things slowly started to improve. It was like all these thoughts and feelings I was stuffing deep down inside had a place to go. When other parents, former and even active addicts started commenting that was when I realized I was not alone. Prior to that for all intents and purposes I was alone and miserable.
I don’t think I can say this enough but thank you so much for being there. Do you guys realize you saved my life? If I had gone on stuffing my feelings and enabling my son one of us would have been dead by now…for sure. I love you all and pray for our children every day.
Addiction with out a doubt may be the worst thing that ever happened to me but it has made me the woman I am today. A more compassionate and empathetic person but also stronger and more equipped to deal with the challenges that are certain to arise.