Something is nagging me…

I am not exactly sure what it is. I know J is coming up on a year anniversary but who is counting? I really don’t. Maybe it is just the timing of the holiday season but it feels like more than that. Ya know that feeling….like the floor is going to drop out from under you, so I really ought to tread carefully. I don’t like it. Am I sensing something, I don’t see? Maybe it is the time of year…addicts in general are NOTORIOUS for not being able to hold it together for the holiday. Maybe I just need to get through this with as much joy as I can muster, my children deserve a merry mommy for Christmas. I hate all things addiction. I am saying the serenity prayer the moment I hit publish.

Anyone else feel extra anxiety regarding relapse this time of year? Deep breathe…


About madyson007

I am a mom of 4 who thought she was home free when my oldest son went off to college. My serious blunder? Genetics and being naive or maybe just plain stupid.
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5 Responses to Something is nagging me…

  1. onemomtalking says:

    Me, me, me! I was just thinking about writing a similar post on my blog. I feel this dread … it’s subtle but kind of hanging following me around. Maybe it’s not just addicts who have a hard time on the holidays. I’ll be deep-breathing with you!

  2. beachteacher says:

    I too HATE all things addiction ! And yes…I know what you mean about the holidays.

  3. Deirdre says:

    I hear you. Peter (23) is mysteriously absent most of the week…then again, it is a relief to have him gone sometimes….I vacillate between wanting him here (I at least know he is alive) and wanting him gone (because he is not attending NA/AA or working..). I hate all this uncertainty, and must refocus on what I can control. Yes, the serenity prayer is close to me too. God bless your family and especially your son. I hope your holidays are full of supernatural peace and love. Deirdre

  4. Barbara says:

    My kid already relapsed so I am stress free 😦

    I hate all things addiction too. I hope there’s nothing going on with J. Just push the thoughts away when they start to nag you – if something happens, it happens, but until then enjoy your family!

  5. Momma says:

    yes, I feel anxious… this time of year, it’s hard on all of us…

    So, you are not alone. Let’s just try to enjoy family.

    Have a good week!

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