I feel like I am getting lazy…well not exactly lazy, maybe I am just letting my guard down? It feels uncomfortable, kind of like I am asking for trouble. I really think no matter how much I try to keep my expectations low and enjoy the moment the mommy who wants everything for her son continues to creep back in. I just can’t hold her under the surface. I talk about the future with J, my hopes and dreams for him. I am being so stupid…I know it, but I still can’t help myself. Has anyone died from disappointment and sorrow? If this magic implodes, I am just not sure I can make it.
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