My body is in mourning…

Ok, tomorrow will be one week since I had surgery. I miss my gallbladder or evidently my body misses it. It is in mourning and letting me know how upset it is, by going on strike! It’s not like I didn’t want to keep the little guy but there are only so many times you can go to the emergency room before everyone starts loosing patience. Sadly, It was time for him to go. The incisions are fine and really only hurt when I sneeze, cough or lift something well and maybe when I sit up to fast. The problem is my stomach has been revolting all week. It has gotten to the point that I am developing a food aversion. Nothing stays in…at all. The doctor seems to think this will improve with time. I have to go back to work on MONDAY!

I don’t know if I ever mentioned it but J’s addiction was the best diet I have ever been on. Anyone else ever go on the *”MOA or POA diet” successfully? In the past two years I dropped 35 pounds, which was a good thing. I am thinner than when I got married which was when I was 21 and umm looked good in a bikini. Why is it I don’t still look good in a bikini. Maybe it’s those dang 4 kids I had…I’m just sayin’.

The whole point of this conversation is…if my stomach revolt keeps up, I am going to be the size 4 I have always dreamed of being by summer and I am thinking this is not a good thing. Geeze it was not like I needed this useless little organ!

On a side note: J has court today. One case has been resolved, and today, this one may be resolved too.  I will post about the outcome of all the cases soon I hope. I can say it does not look like he will be going to jail but there will still be some pretty significant consequences. Anything happens again…hello court appointed lawyer…hello jail…do not pass go.

J looks good and I think one of the consequences he is experiencing is: being of sound mind makes everything so clear to him. It probably felt much easier living through a haze and not having to feel the clarity of his choices. I am proud of him but he has a way to go. His daily choices still feel a little stunted for his age. Waiting until the last minute for everything and not participating in paying bills. His money is still his money but  our money is everyones money. He really gets nothing from us other than food and a warm house but that needs to change and soon. Rent is on the horizon now that he is working a little more. On the other hand two big improvements I see are his sleeping patterns which are MUCH more normal and his sense of time seems to be improving.

I am convinced an active addict has ABSOLUTELY no sense of time. 5 minutes, 2 hours, 0r 20 minutes just does not register. It is not that they won’t get up (even though that may be true sometimes) or move faster to make it to an appointment, it’s like they are unaware and unable to sense time. Everything is just one big illusion when you are high…WTH is up with that?

*MOA= Mom Of an Addict

*POA=Parent Of an Addict

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About madyson007

I am a mom of 4 who thought she was home free with her oldest son when he went off to college. My serious blunder? Genetics and being naive or maybe just plain stupid.
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10 Responses to My body is in mourning…

  1. Tori Lee says:

    First I am sorry you are still in pain – but glad you are feeling better. I think the soreness will last for a bit, surgery is surgery.

    But you gave me a good laugh with the weight thing however I didn’t do so well. I gained 35 pounds and I wasn’t skinny to begin with. Now I have 55 to lose! His addiction had the opposite effect on me and I ate and ate, then found out I have a bad thyroid which has since been removed and now have something called Insulin Resistance. I always complain that I wish if I had to live through this hell it would have caused me to lose weight not gain it! 🙂

    What a great explanation on time. I thought it was just my son but you are right it so right that I am printing that out to remind myself. I know he doesn’t do things on purpose but sober or high he is never, ever on time. Even his Doctor’s office would call him and tell him is appointment was a 1/2 earlier…that’s terrible.

    Thanks for the laugh today!

  2. Lisa Carp says:

    I really thought (at one point) that when Bryan got clean, he would miraculously turn into the young man I thought I was raising and all would be great! Bwahahahaha. The truth is that they stop maturing during the entire time they are doing drugs, and once clean they have a lot of growing up and maturing still to do. And sometimes that is even more frustrating because you feel like you can’t blame the drugs when they are clean!

    And as far as the diet…well as Tori pointed out, while MOA/POA I’ve gained 50 pounds at least…I had been religously working out for the two years prior and had lost about 50 pounds…it is all back! Oh well.

    And I think this is a little unfair too…I didn’t have any aversion to food when I got my gallbladder removed! I need to be you! 🙂 In fact, the doctor told me I would probably have to eat more carefully and avoid things like chocolate and spicy food…no way…I don’t avoid anything! 🙂

  3. Deb says:

    It took a long while before I felt better after my gall bladder surgery too.

  4. Syd says:

    Responsibility doesn’t seem to fit with addictive behavior. At least not until recovery happens. I sometimes think that I deal with a teenager instead of an adult. It is a consequence of the disease.

  5. gal says:

    Fyi, my recovering addict had to have emergency gallbladder surgery in early Oct. It took weeks for her to be able to handle anything but the very mildest of food. It’s different for everyone, but if you research it online, you’ll find a certain percentage of people have issues with food, digestion, etc. after gallbladder surgery. She was eating just fine within a month or two. Take care of yourself.
    -GAL

    • madyson007 says:

      I can’t tell you how glad I am to hear this. Even though being a size 4 sounded wonderful, not ever eating favorites like chocolate, or a steak, or a THanksgiving dinner. or Hot Roast Beef with mashed potatoes and gravy…Ok I will stop now.

  6. Lisa says:

    MOA when first discovered was a good 10 pounds in one week. Seriously kep lt getting in scale in between the madness. I would gag all day long from the stress !!!! My son has no sense of time at all. People are left waiting in cars when giving him rides to court, interviews etc. He has asked me to give him rides next week to new job starting at 7 am. Its not gonna happen. I will end up sitting in driveway till 10 of and then letting my imagination go wild while he is in the house and then I will end up shutting off car and calling it a wrap!

  7. Momma says:

    I had my galbladder removed a few years ago, and basically I feel much better than before, however, I can’t eat what ever I want. Fatty foods, like gravy, fried chicken, anything deep fried, make me feel gross. Other than that, it’s great. I don’t have a problem with spicy food, but I have heard that some people do.

    I hope you feel better soon, and learn what you can or can’t eat.

  8. parent says:

    Where do we find the bikini pics?
    ha ha

    hope you are feeling a bit better…weird I was thinking how much my son’s addiction madness aged me in the last 4 years…the hair I have left is going gray…

    🙂

  9. Barbara says:

    Hi Sweetie, I read this the other day but didn’t comment. I am wondering how you are doing now? How was your first day back at work?

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